GROWING UP

(I'm still looking for the answers....even though I know the results....wrote it on 18th January, 2010)

It's perfectly alright if you tell me
What in the world went wrong about me ?
Neither I'd shout at you nor I'd argue
I'd not even try to hold it against you.

I know well now that you are leaving
It's true even if it's not worth believing.
You must have your own decisive reason
Perhaps it may be friends shutting season.

I look in all my steps that I retrace
Try to solve that ignoring look on your face.
Maybe perhaps I'd rather try you calling
Sort out why in your eyes I'm only falling ?

I know about this timing and structure
About the results I'm going to see soon after.
It was someone else before and now it's you
Another same movie with same sneak preview.

Because it's already happened this extend
When I tried to turn to make a best friend.
Someone who'd try to feel and understand
Against big hurdles we'd together withstand.

But alas even then something went wrong
And I kept on waiting there for too long.
Now I see this cruising towards another pileup
But perhaps maybe this is my way of growing up.

THE JOURNEY

(A lonesome journey that I'm making....leaving behind everything that I had....I hope everything will be ok now....when I'd be really gone !!....wrote it on 17th January, 2010)

I'm making a lonesome journey to nowhere
No address to visit, no contacts to call.
A rover or just a wanderer, yet not lost
For how can I be lost, when I've nowhere to go ?

With oodle of desires, they crawl in my skin
With glimmer of hopes, they fill my heart.
I've got my rusty old wheels in motion
Now I've got a long distant road to beat.

In this lonesome journey of life and death
I'd remember those lost and found memories.
Some familiar faces to be remembered forever
Yet some painfull memories unable to erase off.

Still in the midst of my every thoughts
There'd exist a familiar pretty face of yours.
With the echos of your laugher and cries
They'd remain deep inside my soul till my end.

Call it a running away, or just only a quit
But it's the best repair, that time demands today.
Perhaps at some point in my life, we'd meet someday
When it'd really be alright, when it's gonna be ok.

For now I've found myself a road to nowhere
And I'm not trying to escape it any longer.
I'm making a lonesome journey, with wishes to all
Take care and keep smiling, until we meet again.

TEMPTATION

(I'm lost in your temptation....and I'm loosing control....wrote it on 12th January, 2010)

What black magic you've put upon me ?
I can't say no, my resistance resign.
My inner conscience urge me to stop now
But I just don't have the strength to decline.

I can't eascape your hands of temptation
Choking around my neck, disguised as love.
My silent screams are lost in your eyes
No one to take heed, says the voice from above.

I've now reached to a point of no return
Can't just get your voice out of my brain.
Taking vows of forgetting you, I wonder
When I'd next see your pretty face again.

The fragnance of you sweet temptation
Throughout the veins of my body it flow.
No sweet perfume ever tortured me like this
With my breath is faint and my voice is low.

With all my might I always try to ignore
Running and hiding myself from your limelight.
But I loose myself by the magic of your words
An enchanted temptation like the silent night.

I try to block out all thoughts of you
Before I start to loose all of my head.
But your temptation is a slythering snake
Cling all around me, crushing me till I'm dead.

METALHEADS

(For the "Metalhead" people like me....wrote it on 11th January, 2009)

My guitar screams to the notes that I hit
Be it the lines of Slayer or just Green day.
Putting up some serious heat up on the stage
We are here totally rocking the summer of May.

It's our own rock band which we named Katalyst
Formed when music became the key to our words.
We play music what the people call Heavy Metal
And our work is not for the cowards or the nerds.

Music and style, yeah that's our total passion
Even tried some tattoos to look way fucking cool.
The power and speed of our music is just too much
The other bands, they just stand and watch like fool.

The sound of the chords and bass rocks the show
Fans bang their heads when the snare sounds steel.
After yet another rocking performance on a high
We leave the stage with the heads-held-high feel.

We were grown seeing the likes of Kirk and James
We are the inspiring metalheads in the midst of you.
As long as music lives, our devils horn would rise
Cause real metalheads like us are only rare and few.

THE FACE INSIDE

(I hope someday....someone would see the real face inside this mask....wrote it on 9th January, 2010)

Well look at me, what do you see ?
A pretty face that always grins and lies.
But there's a face within this face
That is always hidden from your eyes.

Pretending is the art that I perform
But please don't get fooled by this game.
For this is just a face to hide myself
A mask that I wear with just a name.

Conspiracies and betryal they did with me
Even they called me a mysterious creep.
Still this face smile and laugh with them
But their words make the face inside to weep.

My face may always seem smooth to you
But this face is just only a mask.
A mask to hide fear, pain and aloneness
A mask to shield me from glances that only ask.

You may wonder why this hidden face inside ?
It's because they don't care my tears and sighs.
So I wear this face to hide the face inside
Which is torn from silent screams and tearless cries.

JUST A FOOL

(For that foolish person inside me....wrote it on the new year day of 2010)

You said that I was a fool to fall in love,
For my dreams which were simply naive.
You said that I was only too stupid enough,
To listen to my heart and believe.

I always wanted to make you understand,
That this fool is a fool for a reason.
But you always remained in the deathly dark,
Delivering only shadows in this season.

You said that I was a fool to hurt myself,
Out of the pain of suffocation and no breathing.
You said that I was a fool to slash my arm open,
Because you won't even care, if I die bleeding.

Cold and dead were the lonely nights,
With my dreams they are jolted awake.
In the midst of dark and flowing times,
Of night’s grandeur, my breath they only shake.

You said that I was a fool to believe in life,
Where no hope would ever present itself.
You said that I was just a fool and nothing more,
To be abused and to be put upon a dusty shelf.

I’ve been cold and I’ve been distant to all,
Perhaps being hated beyond life’s cruelest measure.
Still I’ve foundered love and stood firm upon it,
To seek nothing more than your heart’s treasure.

Still you said that I was a fool to fall in love,
For you are too blinded by games, hate and greed.
But I hope one day, a true fool I can find,
Because this lonely heart is one fool in need.